But soon enough I was heading down ivy-drapedVia Giulia, my arm around Eunice Park’s fragrant, boyish frame. Shewas seemingly in good spirits, promising me a kiss, then chastising my poorItalian. She was shyness and giggles, freckles in the moonlight and drunken,immature cries of “Shut up, Lenny!” and “You’re such an idiot!” I noticed shehad released her hair from the bun’s captivity and that it was dark and endlessand thick as twine. She was twenty-four years old.
My apartment could accommodate no more than a cheaptwin-size mattress and a fully opened suitcase, brimming with books. (“MyText-major friends at Elderbird used to call those things ‘doorstops,’ ” shetold me.) We kissed, lazily, like it was nothing, then roughly, like we meantit. There were some problems. Eunice Park wouldn’t take off her bra (“I haveabsolutely no chest”), and I was too drunk and scared to develop an erection.But I didn’t want intercourse anyway. The next morning, she was kind enough tohelp me repack my suitcase, which refused to close without her help. “That’snot how you do it,” she said, when she saw me brushing my teeth. She made mestick out my tongue and roughly scraped its purple surface with the toothbrush.“There,” she said. “Better.”
During the taxi ride to the airport I felt the triplepangs of being happy and lonely and needy all at once. She had made me wash mylips and chin thoroughly to obliterate every trace of her, but Eunice Park’salkaline tang remained on the tip of my nose. I made great sniffing motions inthe air, trying to capture her essence, thinking already of how I would baither toNew York,make her my life, my life eternal. I touched my expertly brushed teeth andpetted the flurry of gray hairs sticking out from beneath my shirt collar,which she had thoroughly examined in the morning’s weak early light. “Cute,”she had said. And then, with a child’s sense of wonder, “You’re old, Len.”
June 1: From the GlobalTeens account of Eunice Park.
Euni-Tard Abroad to Grillbitch.
Hi, Precious Panda!
So, guess what? I met the cutest guy inRome. He is exactly my type, tall, kind ofGerman-looking, very preppie, but not an asshole. Giovanna set me up withhim—he’s inRomeworking for LandO’LakesGMFordCredit! So I go to meet him in the Piazza Navona(remember Image Class? Navona’s the one with all the Tritons) and he’s sittingthere having a cappuccino and streaming “Chronicles of Narnia”! Remember westreamed that in Catholic? So adorable. His name is Ben, which is pretty gay,but he wasso niceand so
smart. He took me to look at some Caravaggios and then he kind of like touched
my butt a little and then we went to one of Giovanna’s parties and made out.
There were all these Italian girls in Onionskin jeans staring at us, like I was
stealing one of their white guys or something. I fucking hate that. If they
mention my “almond eyes” one more time, I swear. Anyway,I need your advicebecausehe called yesterday and asked if I wanted to go up toLuccawith him next week and I was playinghard to get and said no. But I’m going to call him and say yes tomorrow!What should I do?Help!!!
P.S. I met this old, gross guy at a party yesterday and
we got really drunk and I sort of let him go down on me. There was another even
older guy, this sculptor, trying to get in my pants, so I figured, you know,
the lesser evil. Ugh, I’m turning into you!!!!! The first old guy took me to
dinner at this restaurant, da Tonino, which was like O.K. He was nice, kind of
dorky, although he thinks he’s so Media cause he works in biotech or something.
And he had the grossest feet, bunions and this gigantic heel spur that sticks
out like he’s got a thumb glued to his foot. I know, I’m thinking like my dad.
Anyway, he brushes his teeth all wrong, so I had toSHOW A GROWN MAN HOW TO USE A TOOTHBRUSH!!!!!What is wrong with my life, Precious Panda?
但是很快我走向紫藤垂掛的茱莉亞大道，胳膊環(huán)著尤尼斯·帕克芳香的男孩子一樣的骨架。她看來精神不錯，她說要給我一個吻，接著卻責(zé)罵我不倫不類的意大利語。她羞怯地笑，月光映出臉上的雀斑，她有點(diǎn)醉，孩子氣的大嚷“閉嘴，列尼！”或者“你真是廢物！”我留意到她解開了頭發(fā)，黑發(fā)如瀑。她24歲。
我的公寓到處都是書，僅能容下一個廉價的一對床尺寸的褥子和一個完全張開的行李箱。（“我在Elderbird的Text-major朋友們曾稱這些東西為“制門器”,尤尼斯告訴我。）我們接吻，起先懶洋洋地，好像都不在乎，接著又狠狠地吻，就好像我們很認(rèn)真。但是有些問題，就是尤尼斯·帕克不愿意解下她的內(nèi)衣（“我平胸啊”她辯解）,我醉醺醺的，戰(zhàn)戰(zhàn)兢兢，脫不下褲子，但我也沒想把她怎么樣。第二天早上，她友好的幫我重新整理行李箱（沒她扶著，行李箱合不上）。“你不該這么做。”她說，那會她看到我在刷牙。她讓我伸出舌頭，用牙刷粗粗地刮了一下紫色舌面。“你瞧，好多了。”她說。
乘出租去機(jī)場的路上我一下子覺得又歡樂又孤獨(dú)又窮困。她讓我徹底清洗我的嘴唇和面頰好除去她的痕跡，但尤尼斯·帕克強(qiáng)烈的堿性味道依然縈繞在我的鼻尖。我用鼻子深吸一口氣，試圖捕捉她的精華，想著我該怎樣引誘她去紐約，讓她變成我的生活，我永恒的生活。我摸了一下自己刷得很專業(yè)的牙，拍了一下從襯衣領(lǐng)帶下探出的亂糟糟的灰白頭發(fā)。那天早上她剛對著微弱晨光全身打量了一番。“很可愛”，她說。然后，帶著孩子一般迷惘的神情，加了一句，“你老了，列尼。”
7月1號：來自尤尼斯·帕克的GlobalTeen賬戶
尤尼-塔德（國外）致Grillbitch
嗨，寶貝熊貓！
你猜怎么著？我在羅馬遇到了一個最和我心意的人。他呢，正是我喜歡的那種類型，長的很像一個德國人，穿著刻板，但是一點(diǎn)都不讓人覺得討厭。喬凡娜安排我倆見的面——他在羅馬就職于LandO’LakesGMFordCredit！我去納沃納廣場和他見的面（還記得ImageClass嗎？。。）他正坐在那兒，喝著一杯卡布奇諾，瀏覽《納尼亞傳奇》！還記得我們在天主教堂也看過嗎？真是討人喜歡。他叫本，很英俊也很聰明。他帶我去看浮世繪，然后他若有若無地摸了一下我的屁股，接著我們?nèi)チ思{沃納的一個聚會，后來就開始接吻擁抱。所有穿著亮閃閃的薄牛仔褲的意大利妞都盯著我們，好像我偷了她們的一個同胞似的。我恨透了她們。我發(fā)誓，她們要是再提一句我的“杏仁眼”，我讓他們好看。不過，我想聽聽你的看法。因?yàn)樽蛱焖螂娫拞栁沂欠裨敢庀轮芨粔K去盧卡，我呢，就假意拒絕了。但是明天我準(zhǔn)備打電話給他說我同意去。我該怎么辦呢？幫幫我。
寶貝熊貓?
附注：在昨天的聚會上我遇見了一個又丑又惡心的老男人，我們喝的爛醉。我好像還讓他幫我做了口交。還有一個更丑的人，雕刻家，想占我便宜，所以我就看出哪個是不太齷齪的。哎，我現(xiàn)在變得跟你似的！！！第一個又丑又老的男人帶我去一家叫da Tonino（聽上去像ok） 的餐廳吃飯。他人很好，有點(diǎn)笨，但他還覺得自己很潮，因?yàn)樗谝患疑锟萍贾惖墓竟ぷ鳌Ｋ哪_是我見過最惡心的腳，有拇囊炎和根骨骨刺綜合癥，突出去的那塊好像是腳上粘了什么東西，我知道，我說話的語氣跟我爸一樣。不過，他刷牙的方式完全錯誤，所以我得給這個成年人展示如何正確刷牙。我的人生到底怎么了,寶貝熊貓?
