1. Even the happy songs are the minor key.
連歡樂的歌曲都是用降調譜寫而成。
(點評: 那悲愴的曲子要用什么調子來譜寫呢?)
2. I had the best day ever. I ran into my ex-boyfriend and his new girlfriend-with my car.
今天是我最得意的日子。我碰到我的男朋友和他的新女友了-是用我的車硬碰上去的。
(點評: 比O.J.Simpson 還心狠手辣。)
3. I made a killing in the stock market. My broker lost all my money, so I killed him.
我在股市上大有斬獲。我的經紀人把我的身家全炒沒了,所以我把他給斬了。
(點評: 人家只是要錢,你卻是要命!)
4. I had a nightmare I was in an elevator with Yanni, Kenny G, and Michael Bolton...and I had a gun with only one bullet.
我做了個噩夢:我和雅尼,肯尼基和麥克波爾頓同坐一部電梯...而我有一把只剩一顆子彈的手槍。
(點評: 他們這幾位仁兄的電梯音樂聽多了真教人有自殺傾向啊!)
5. If I've told you once, I've told you a thousand times:? don't exaggerate!
我都跟你說了不下一千遍了:別夸大其詞!
(點評: 我數了數,你才說了九百九十九遍!)