My name is Anthony. I left hometown in the spring of 2005. I brought with me my clothes, my jackets, toothpaste made in Yunnan, Head & Shoulders shampoo. My laptop is in Chinese operating system, novels written in Chinese, an electric blanket, and even a Chinese cleaver.
我叫安東尼。2005年春天出國,從國外帶來了大學時候穿的衣服、秋衣秋褲、云南白藥牙膏、海飛絲洗發水、計算機是中文系統、中文的小說、電褥子,甚至還帶來中國的菜刀。
I didn't feel anything has changed, until I woke up next morning, I glaced at my watch, 8 a.m.. Then I checked the clock on my bedstand, 11 a.m.. The 3 hours that had slipped away make me accept that I'm far from home.
本來,我還沒有什么異樣的感覺,直到醒來的時候,我下意識看了一下手表,8點。再看看床頭的鬧鐘,11點。那被偷掉的三個小時告訴我,我真的已經在國外了。
At that time, wandering in the city, I didn't feel I belong yet, I'd keep my head up, I feel obligated to make my people proud. To keep my spirits soaring high.
當時,走在城市里,也不覺得自己屬于這個城市,總是潛意識地昂頭挺胸,不想給中國人丟臉。想要把靈魂高高的掛起來。
I think everyone in uni, they all look so carefree, having a bright future and all, but not for me. I've been quite confused.
我覺得大學,大家都好像很自由,對未來充滿了希望。可是,我一直無法看清前面的路。
Then I started to learn about Western cuisine, and I have a feeling that's what I wanna do. Whenever I have time now, I'll go and try different restaurants. I don't feel lonely dining alone. The food here is fresh and delicious. It's also very creative.
直到我遇到了這里的西餐料理,我才感覺到前所未有的充實。只要我一有空,我就會四處尋找美食。就算我一個人,我也不會覺得孤單。我覺得這里的美食,除了新鮮、好吃,而且還充滿了創意。
I want to create such wonderful dishes. I hope culinary arts can become my way to connect with other people and the world. I think that if I'm able to experess my self through my dish, I'd be on top of the world.
我好想親手去創造這么美好的東西。我好想讓烹飪成為我和這個世界,成為我和其他人連結的方法。我想如果我可以用它來表達我自己,我就會特別特別的滿足。
Someone once encouraged me to hold on to what I'm passionate about. Regardless of how silly it seemed. But probably, only those who really care about me won't think it's silly.
曾經有人令我覺得只要做自己喜歡做的事情,就算別人覺得蠢也是值得的。但也有可能只有在乎我的人才不會覺得我蠢。
I believe you just need to follow your passion, the future will take care of itself.
只要做喜歡做的事情,就自然有路讓你走下去。
During this period of time, I've changed my major and in my second year now. I've watched a movie, saw a theatre production, went to two art shows. Haven't been particularly homesick, but I do think of you sometimes.
在這不長不短的日子里,我給自己改了專業,現在讀二年級。看了一場電影,一次話劇,兩次畫展。我沒有特別想家,偶爾想你。
——安東尼
Do you know? When you're shooting a movie, both the camera and the sound recorder have to operate at 24 frames per second. Otherwise the visuals won't synchronize with the sound. One frame off and it's ruined.
你知道嗎?拍電影的時候,要把攝影機和收音器材同時調到24格(幀/秒),聲音和畫面才會同步,差一格都不行。
I reckon filmmaking is like living out our lives. Every shot is a lost opportunity. Every frame has its own regrets. 24 fps, 25 fps. One frame more and it's out of sync.
其實拍電影跟做人一樣,每個鏡頭就是在不斷地錯過,無止盡地遺憾。24格,25格,之差一個就不同步了。
Anyway I won't allow my present to be a mere shadow of my past.
我可不想把我的未來變成過去的縮影。
——小櫻《陪安東尼度過漫長歲月》