We are going to do a lot of believing in ourselves.

I believe in you. You can do well. You can succeed.

Take responsibility for your life.

Stop blaming. Stop blaming the government.

Stop blaming your teachers. Stop blaming your parents.

It is up to you to succeed.

Marva Collins

“Positive Learning”

I think I did pretty wonderful. (我想我做得很好)

I think I’m bright. I think I am unique. (我想我很聰明 我很特別)

And I’ll teach every child of me to think that. (我會教每個孩子這樣想)

When they misbehave,(當他們不守規矩的時候)

Their punishment is they have to write 100 reasons (他們的懲罰就是要寫100個原因)

Why they are too wonderful to do what they are doing. (說明為什么他們棒到要做那樣的事)

And they have to be alpha order. (而且它們要按字母順序寫)

I am adorable. I am beautiful. I am courageous. (我很可愛 我很漂亮 我很勇敢)

I give them the first ones until they get the hang out of it. (我給他們例子直到他們明白)

I am delightful. I am effervescent. I am fabulous. (我令人快樂 我很興奮 我很厲害)

I am heavenly. I am idolized. I am just wonderful. (我很棒 我是榜樣 我無與倫比)

I am a kindred spirit. I am lovable. I am momentous. (我很熱情 我很可愛 我很重要)

I am never, never under line. (我從不調皮)

And it goes on to z.And if they do it again, (一直寫到最后一個字母 如果他們再犯)

Then they have to use another synonym. (他們必須要用另一個同義詞)

They can’t use adorable any more. (他們不能再用可愛了)

Now the children will say to a new student, (現在孩子們會對新學生說)

I know why you don’t behave. (我知道你為什么不守規矩了)

Coz I’m tired of telling Ms.Collins how wonderful I am. (因為我厭倦告訴Ms.Collins我有多棒了)

She herself is the message as a role model. (她本身就是榜樣)

And she studied with her kids, role models. (她和孩子們學習榜樣)

They read fiction books. They read historical books. (他們讀小說 歷史書)

They read books about heroes and talk about heroes. (他們讀關于英雄的書 談論英雄的事)

They all identify role models. (他們都認清了誰是榜樣)

They identify role models in their neighbourhood, (他們從社區里挑出榜樣)

in their families, constantly doing that, (在家庭里挑出榜樣 不斷地這樣做)

which is exactly what you need to cultivate resilience. (這就是你培養適應力要做的事)

First an foremost, she herself is the role model. (首先 她就是榜樣)

She has high expectations. (她有著很高的期望)

We are going to do a lot of believing in ourselves. (我們要大量練習自信)

We are going to do well, succeed. (我們要表現優秀 我們要成功)

She expects a lot. She sees the potential. (她有很多期待 她能看到潛力)

She appreciates that potential in each individual. (她欣賞每個人的潛力)

Stop blaming others. Take responsibility for your life. (停止抱怨別人 承擔自己生活的責任)

Marva Collins is no push-over. (Marva Collins并不是軟弱的人)

If you see her in the classroom, she is tough. She is demanding. (教室里的她要求很嚴格)

At the same time, she respects each individual. (同時 她尊重每個人)

She is not one of the Pollyannish ”feel-good”, (她不是不切實際的“感覺良好”)

“let’s make them all feel good” at all cost. (我們不惜一切代價讓他們感覺良好)

Not at all.(根本不是)

She believes in them. She respects them. (她相信他們 她尊重他們)

And she is tough and demanding—(而且她要求很嚴格)

important combination for leadership. (這是領導的重要因素)

It’s why I mentioned earlier (這就是為什么我之前提到)

in the context of great leadership book. (它是一本好的領導書籍)

There are many very nice ex-CEOs (有很多非常和善的前總裁)

whose primary aim was to be nice and to be liked, (他們的主要目標就是和善和受歡迎)

the keys to get he job done, (完成工作的關鍵)

to get the work done, (完成事情的關鍵)

while being respectful. (同時也要尊重他人)

Sense of optimism. (她有樂觀精神)

You can do well. (你可以做好)

You are going to do well, (你會做得很好)

helping them set goals for themselves and for community. (幫助他們為自己和社區設立目標)

And finally, (最后)

from focusing on deficiencies to focusing on strength. (從專注缺點到專注優點)

Howard Gardner from the ED(Education)school here talks about (來自教育學校的Howard Gardner)

multiple intelligences, says that we need to stop asking (談到了多元智力 他說我們要停止問)

whether or not a student is smart. (一個學生是否聰明)

What we need to ask is what is the student smart at. (我們要問這個學生有什么優點)

And when we identify what that student is smart at, (認清這個學生的優點)

strong at, virtuous at, good at, then we appreciate it. (長處之后 我們便欣賞它)

And when we appreciate it, (當我們欣賞它的時候)

it and the whole person appreciates. (優點和那整個人都會增值)

What would happen to a seed—seed is potential—(假如有一粒種子…種子是有潛力的)

flower, tree—what would happen to a seed, (它會長成花草樹木…假如有一粒種子)

if it is not watered, if no light is shed on it? (如果它沒有受到灌溉 沒有陽光照耀會怎樣？)

It will wither and die. (它會枯萎死去)

The exact same thing with human potential. (人類的潛力也是這樣)

If we don’t water it, if we don’t shed a light on it, (如果我們不灌溉它 如果我們不照耀它)

it will wither and die. (它會枯萎死去)

The same with interpersonal relationship potential. (人際關系也是這樣)

If we don’t—we’ll talk a lot about relationships: (如果我們…我們會經常談到關系)

how to cultivate healthy long-term relationships—(如何培養健康長期的關系)

if you don’t water it, if you don’t shed light, (如果你不灌溉它 不照耀它)

if you don’t appreciate the good, the good will depreciate. (如果你不欣賞它的好處 好處就會貶值)

Essentially, (本質上)

what Marva Collins does is create for students—(Marva Collins所做的)

what the research in resilience does is (也就是適應力的作用就是)

create a very different model than the conventional wisdom. (締造一個與傳統智慧不同的榜樣)

The paradigm shift essentially is from being a passive victim (范式轉移實質上是從被動接受者…)

because the government is not putting enough money, (也就是政府沒有投入足夠資金)

which is an issue, not belittling it. (這是一個問題 應該重視)

It’s important to have those external (用外部條件 比如資源)

affect the internal like more resources. (影響內在性格很重要)

But that’s not enough. (但那并不足夠)

From an inactive, from a passive victim, (從一個不積極 被動的受害者)

she changes her perspectiveto be an active agent. (成為一個主動地人 她改變了看法)

You are not “unteachable”. (你并非“不可教”)

You can thrive. You can do well. You can succeed. (你可以發展 你可以做好 你可以成功)

And what she does, essentially, (而她所做的實質上)

is take them to the extreme of continuum, because every event, (就是把他們帶到連續體的極點)

every person can be situated somewhere along this continuum, (因為每件事每個人都處于連續體的某處)

I mean different places with different things. (我是說 不同的地方和不同的事物)

Think about your own life. (想想你自己的生活)

What are you? (你是哪種人？)

passive victim in different situations or an active agent? (各種情況的被動受害者還是主動者？)

But let’s say my girlfriend leaves me. (但是假如我女朋友離開了我)

If I am the passive victim, what I experience is self-pity. (如果我是被動受害者 那我只會自憐)

Feel sorry for myself. Roominate—remember the word? (為自己感到難過 思考)

Roominate about the situation and how terrible it is. (思考這種情況以及他有多糟糕)

From a passive victim, I then move to blame: she’s terrible; (我從一個被動受害者變成抱怨者 她很糟糕)

it’s her fault; I blame her; (都是她的錯 我怨她)

I blame my parents, the way they raise me; (我抱怨我的父母 他們養育不當)

I blame her parents, I blame President Bush or whomever. (我抱怨她的父母 我抱怨布什總統)

And after I blame, I experience frustration as well as anger. (抱怨之后 我變得沮喪和憤怒)

Anger toward her, toward my parents, her parents, (對她生氣 對我父母生氣 對她父母生氣)

President Bush, Hilary, whoever it is. I feel anger. (布什總統 希拉里 總之我很憤怒)

And results—very few results. (結果呢 很少結果)

Because I wallow in illumination and self-pity. (因為我沉迷于反思和自憐中)

Let’s take the other extreme of the active agent. (我們再反觀積極主動者)

First of all, by definition, I take action. (首先 從定義來看 我會行動)

I take responsibility. (我承擔責任)

I go on to places after experiencing the pain—(經歷痛苦之后我會到處走走)

it’s painful, and next time we are going to talk about (它很痛苦 下節課我們會談談)

theimportance of experiencing the pain of giving ourselves (經歷痛苦的重要性)

what I called the permission to be human, (談談允許自己人性化)

but once I experience it, I take action. (但是我經歷痛苦之后 我會行動)

I go out there to places where I will meet someone. (我去能認識他人的地方)

I go to Pinnochio’s(Pizza place at Harvard), (我去匹諾曹（哈佛的比薩店）)

Or another meeting place, the Stax in Whitener (?) (或者另一個約會地點)

Well I guess things have changed (我想時世變遷了)

at Harvard since I was an undergrad. (現在的哈佛和我畢業時的不同了)

I take responsibility for it. (我承擔責任)

And then as a result of that—(這樣做的結果是…)

and we’ll talk about research on self-perception theory, (我們會談談自我認識理論)

research by Darl Bem. (它是Darl Bem的研究)

I’ll take action and action will increase our level of confidence (我會行動 行動會增加我們的自信)

And then morehopeandoptimismis a result. (結果是更多的希望和樂觀)

As we talk about belief in self-fulfilling prophecy lecture, (就像在自我應驗預言課程中所說的)

hope and optimism become a self-fulfilling prophecy. (希望和樂觀會變成自我應驗預言)

I’m much more likely to find someone. (我更容易找到伴侶)

I’m certainly much more likely to be happy. (我更可能變得開心)

Once again, being an active agent (重申一次 作為積極主動者)

does not mean not giving ourselves the time, (并不意味著不給我們自己時間)

the space, the permission to experience painful emotions, (空間去讓自己感受痛苦的情感)

to go through the emotion. (以及擺脫這種情感)

Yes, by all means, we go through it. However, (沒錯 我們一定會擺脫它 然而)

what it is also saying is that we need to find the right time—(我們要在適合的時間)

it could be immediately, it could be a day or two later—(它可能是現在 可能是一兩天后)

to take action, to take responsibility, to do things so that (去行動 去承擔責任 去做事情 這樣)

our confidence levels in our hope and optimism increase. (我們對希望和樂觀的自信就會增加)

Nathaniel Branden talks about six pillars (Nathaniel Branden談到了六根支柱)

Six important pillars in self- esteem.(自尊的六根重要支柱)

One of those pillars isself-responsibility. (其中一根就是自我負責)

People who have high self-esteem take responsibility. (自尊心強的人會承擔責任)

People who want to cultivate high self-esteem (想培養高自尊心)

and create confidence, take responsibility (培養自信的人會承擔責任)

for their lives and so on. (承擔生活的責任等等)

--Understanding that you have to (明白你必須)

take responsibility for you life is recognizing understanding (為生活承擔責任就是理解)

that no one is coming. (沒人會來)

No one is coming to—the knight in shining armour (沒人會來…穿著閃亮鎧甲的騎士)

who will take you to the happily-after land. (不會來帶你到幸福樂園)

No one is coming to make your life better for you. (沒人會來讓你的生活更美好)

No one is coming. (沒人會來)

You are responsible for your life, for your self-confidence, (你為自己的生活負責 獲得自信)

for your self-esteem, for your happiness. (自尊 幸福)

No one is coming. (沒人會來)

So he was talking about this in one of his workshops (他在研討會上談到了這個)

that’s a three-day workshop. (那是一個為期三天的研討會)

And this was already on the third day (這已經是第三天了)

and the workshop was going well. (研討會進展順利)

The participants were getting a lot out of it. (參與者都學到了很多)

And he said, he told them about this idea that no one is coming. (他說 他告訴他們沒人會來)

And one of the participants raises his hand and says, (其中一名參與者舉手說)

“Dr.Branden, that’s not true.” (“Branden博士 事實并非這樣”)

And Nathaniel Branden asks him,”What do you mean?” And he says, (Nathaniel Branden問他“為什么” 他說)

“Dr.Branden, you came”, to which Branden responded, (“Branden博士 你來了” Branden回應道)

“Yes, I came. But I came to tell you that no one is coming.” (“沒錯 我來了 但我是來告訴你沒人會來”)

No one is coming. (沒人會來)

It’s up to you to make the most out of this experience, (能否最大限度地從這次經歷中獲益全在于你)