Deep inside all of us, we know there is someone we were meant to be. And we can feel when we're becoming that person. The reverse is also true. We know when something's off and we're not the person we were meant to be.
在我們所有人的內心深處，其實是知道我們注定成為怎樣的人的。而且當我們正在成為那個人的時候，我們是能感覺到的。反過來也是如此。當事情偏離軌跡的時候，我們知道自己并未成為那個本該成為的人。
Consciously or not, we are all on a quest for answers, trying to learn the lessons of life. We grapple with fear and guilt. We search for meaning, love, and power. We try to understand fear, loss, and time. We seek to discover who we are and how we can become truly happy.
無論是否意識到，我們都在尋找答案，試圖學會人生的課程。我們盡力克服恐懼和愧疚。我們搜尋意義，愛與力量。我們試著去理解恐懼，失去和時間。我們探尋著去發現我們是誰，以及我們怎樣才能真正快樂。
Sometimes we look for these things in the faces of our loved ones, in religion, God, or other places where they reside. Too often, however, we search for them in money, status, the "perfect" job, or other places, only to find that these things lack the meaning we had hoped to find and even bring us heartaches.
有時我們在所愛之人的臉上，在宗教，神，或者其他它們存在的地方尋找。然而，更多的時候，我們在金錢，地位，“完美”的工作，或者其他地方搜尋，卻只能發現這些東西缺乏了我們希望找到的意義，更甚還會讓我們心痛不已。
Following these false trails without a deeper understanding of their meaning, we are inevitably left feeling empty, believing that there is little or no meaning to life, that love and happiness are simply illusions.
跟隨這些錯誤的蹤跡，而沒有對它們的意義有深入的理解，留給我們的將是不可避免地感到空虛，開始相信人生少有甚至毫無意義，愛與快樂都只是錯覺。
Some people find meaning through study, enlightenment,? or creativity. Others discover it while looking at unhappiness, or even death, directly in the eye. Perhaps they were told by their doctors they had cancer or had only six months to live.? Maybe they watched loved ones battle for life or were threatened by earthquakes or other disasters.
有些人通過學習，開悟或創造來找到意義。其他人發現意義，來自于不幸，甚至是直面死亡。或許他們被醫生告知得了癌癥，或者只有六個月的生命。也許他們看著所愛之人為人生而戰，或者受到地震或其他災害的威脅。
They were at the edge. They were also on the brink of a new life. Looking right into the "eye of the monster, " facing death directly, completely and fully, they surrendered to it-and their view of life was forever changed as they learned a lesson of life.
他們如在刀尖。他們也在新生活的邊緣。直視"眼中的怪物"，面對死亡，他們直接地、完全地、充分地，向它投降——而正因他們學會了人生之課，他們對生活的看法永遠地改變了。
These people had to decide, in the darkness of despair, what they wanted to do with the rest of their life. Not all of these lessons are enjoyable to learn, but everyone finds that they enrich the texture of life. So why wait until the end of life to learn the lessons that could be learned now?
在這黑暗的絕望中，這些人不得不決定，他們在余生究竟想要做什么。不是所有的這些經驗教訓都能學得很愉快，但每個人都發現他們豐富了人生的質感。所以為什么非得等到垂死之際才學習這些本可以現在就學會的課程呢？
What are these lessons life asks us to master? In working with the dying and the living, it becomes clear that most of us are challenged by the same lessons: the lesson of fear, the lesson of guilt, the lesson of anger, the lesson of forgiveness, the lesson of surrender, the lesson of time, the lesson of patience, the lesson of love, the lesson of relationships, the lesson of play, the lesson of loss, the lesson of power, the lesson of authenticity, and the lesson of happiness.
哪些是生活要求我們掌握的課程？在面對死亡與生活，顯而易見的是我們大多數人都被同樣的課程挑戰：恐懼之課，內疚之課，憤怒之課、寬恕之課、投降之課，時間之課，耐心之課、愛之課、關系之課，玩樂之課，失去之課，力量之課，真實之課和幸福之課。
Learning lessons is a little like reaching maturity. You're not suddenly more happy, wealthy, or powerful, but you understand the world around you better, and you're at peace with yourself. Learning life's lessons is not about making your life perfect, but about seeing life as it was meant to be. As one man shared, "I now delight in the imperfections of life. "
學習課程有一點像逐漸成熟。你不可能突然變得更快樂，更富有，更有力量，但是你更好地了解了周圍的世界，并達到了自我的平和。學習人生之課并不是讓你的生活變得完美，而是看見人生本該成為的模樣。正如某人說的，“我現在因人生的不完美而愉悅。”
We're put here on earth to learn our own lessons. No one can tell you what your lessons are;it is part of your personal journey to discover them. On these journeys we may be given a lot, or just a little bit, of the things we must grapple with, but never more than we can handle. Someone who needs to learn about love may be married many times, or never at all. One who must wrestle with the lesson of money may be given none at all, or too much to count.
我們降臨地球只為學會自己的課程。沒有人可以告訴你，你的課究竟是哪些，它是你發現它們的私人之旅的一部分。在這些旅程中我們可能得到許多，或者僅僅一點，我們必須努力克服的東西，絕不會比我們能夠勝任的更多。有些需要學習如何愛的人可能成婚數次，也可能從未結婚。一個必須應對金錢之課的人或許會一個子兒都得不到，也可能會數錢數到手軟。
We will look at life and living in this book, discovering how life is seen from its outer edge. We will learn that we are not alone, seeing instead how we are all connected, how love grows, how relationships enrich us. Hopefully, we will correct the perception that we are weak, realizing that not only do we have power, we have all the power of the universe within ourselves. We will learn the truth about our illusions, about happiness and the grandness of who we really are. We will learn how we have been given everything we need to make our lives work beautifully.
我們將會在本書中面對生命和生活，發現從外界邊緣看生活是怎樣的。我們將學到我們并不孤單，反而看到我們都被連接著，我們將學習如何讓愛滋長，如何令關系使我們富足。我們希望糾正我們是弱者的看法，意識到我們不只有力量，我們有自己內在宇宙的所有力量。我們將學習有關我們錯覺的真相，有關我們究竟是誰的幸福與偉大。我們將學習如何用給予我們所需要的一切，使我們的生活更美好。
In facing loss, the people we have worked with realized that love is all that matters. Love is really the only thing we can possess, keep with us, and take with us. They've stopped looking for happiness "out there." Instead, they've learned how to find richness and meaning in those things they already have and are, to dig deeper into the possibilities that are already there.
在面對失去時，我們影響到的那些人意識到，唯愛需在意。愛真的是我們唯一擁有、陪伴和隨行的。他們不再從外界尋求幸福。相反地，他們學會了如何在已經得到的和他們已經成為的事物里找尋富足和意義，去更深地挖掘已然存在的可能性。
In short they've broken down the walls that "protected" them from life's fullness. They no longer live for tomorrow, waiting for the exciting news about the job or the family, for the raise or the vacation. Instead, they have found the richness of every today, for they have learned to listen to their heart.
總之，他們打破了“保護”他們免于人生充實的圍墻。他們不再為明天而活，不再等待工作、家庭、加薪或假期這些激動人心的消息。相反，他們找到了每一天的豐碩，因為他們學會了如何傾聽自己的內心。
Life hands us lessons, universal truths teaching us the basics about love, fear, time, power, loss, happiness, relationships, and authenticity. We are not unhappy today because of the complexities of life. We are unhappy because we miss its underlying simplicities. The true challenge is to find the pure meaning in these lessons.
生活給了我們課程，宇宙的真理教導我們有關愛、恐懼、時間、力量、失去、幸福、關系和真實的基礎知識。我們今天的不開心不是由于生活的復雜性。我們的不開心是因為我們錯過了隱藏的簡單性。真正的挑戰是在這些課程中找到純粹的意義。
Many of us think we were taught about love. Yet we do not find love fulfilling, because it's not love. It is a shadow darkened by fear, insecurities, and expectations. We walk the earth together yet feel alone, helpless, and ashamed.
我們當中的很多人認為我們是被教導著懂得愛情的。但我們找不到愛的充實，因為這不是愛情。它是被陰影籠罩的恐懼，不安，以及期望。我們一起在地球上行走，卻感到孤獨、無助和羞愧。
When we face the worst that can happen in any situation, we grow. When circumstances are at their worst, we can find our best. When we find the true meaning of these lessons, we also find happy, meaningful lives. Not perfect, but authentic. We can live life profoundly.
當我們面對在任何情況下可能發生的最糟情形時，我們成長了。在最糟糕的情況發生時，我們能夠找到最好的我們。當我們找到真正意義上的這些課程時，我們也同時發現了幸福、有意義的生活。或許并不完美，但卻真實。我們可以深刻地經歷人生。
Perhaps this is the first and least obvious question: Who is it that is learning these lessons? Who am I?
We ask ourselves this question over and over again during our lives. We know for sure that between birth and death there is an experience that we call life. But am I the experience or the experiencer? Am I this body? Am I my faults? Am I this disease? Am I a mother, banker, clerk, or sports fan? Am I a product of my upbringing? Can I change-and still be me-or am I cast in stone?
這也許是最明顯和最不明顯的問題：是誰在學習這些課程？我是誰？
我們在人生中反復問自己這個問題。我們確信出生和死亡之間是一種我們稱之為生活的體驗。但是我到底是這個經驗還是經驗者呢？我是這具軀殼嗎？我是我的過錯嗎？我是這種疾病嗎？我是一位母親、銀行家、秘書或運動迷嗎？我是我的教養的產物嗎？我可以改變嗎——并且仍然還是我——或者我是一成不變的嗎？
You are none of those things. You undoubtedly have faults, but they are not you. You may have a disease, but you are not your diagnosis. You may be rich, but you are not your credit rating. You are not your resume, your neighborhood, your grades, your mistakes, your body, your roles or titles.
你哪一種都不是。你無疑有缺點，但他們并不是你。你可能有一種疾病，但你不是你的病情診斷。你可能很富有，但你不是你的信用評級。你不是你的簡歷，你的鄰居，你的成績，你的錯誤，你的軀殼，你的角色或頭銜。
All these things are not you because they are changeable. There is a part of you that is indefinable and changeless, that does not get lost or change with age, disease, or circumstances. There is an authenticity you were born with, have lived with, and will die with. You are simply, wonderfully, you.
所有這些都不是你，因為他們是易變的。有一部分的你是無法定義和亙古不變的，那部分的你不會為年齡、疾病或境遇而改變。那是你生來就有的，伴你成長的，并與你共死的真實。簡單地說，美妙地說，你，就是你。
Watching those who battle illness makes it clear that to see who we are we must shed everything that is not authentically us. When we see the dying, we no longer see those faults, mistakes, or diseases that we focused on before. Now we see only them, because at the end of life they become more genuine, more honest, more themselves-just like children and infants.
看著那些與病情戰斗的人們，使得一切已經很清晰可見，我們必須擺脫一切非真實的我們。當我們看到死亡時，我們不再看到之前關注的那些缺點、錯誤或疾病。現在我們看到的只有那些人，因為在生命的盡頭他們變得更真實、更誠實、更像自己——就像是嬰童一樣。
Are we only able to see who we actually are at life's beginnings and endings? Do only extreme circumstances reveal ordinary truths? Are we otherwise blind to our genuine selves? This is the key lesson of life: to find our authentic selves, and to see the authenticity in others.
我們是不是只能在人生的起點和終點看到我們實際上是誰？是不是只有在極端的情況下才會顯示普遍的真相？否則是不是我們就看不到真正的自我？這就是生命的關鍵課程：要找到我們真實的自我，并且看到其他人的真實性。
The great Renaissance artist Michelangelo was once asked how he created sculptures such as the Pietas or David. He explained that he simply imagined the statue already inside the block of rough marble, then chipped away the excess to reveal what had always been there. The marvelous statue, already created and eternally present, was waiting to be revealed.
偉大的文藝復興時期藝術家米開朗基羅，曾經被問到是如何創造如圣母憐子像或大衛那樣的雕塑。他解釋說只需要想象粗糙大理石塊之中已然存在的雕像，然后鑿掉剩下的那些，顯現出來的就是一直存在在那里的。奇妙的雕像，早已被創造并永恒存在，正等待著被揭示。
So is the great person already inside of you ready to be revealed. Everyone carries the seeds of greatness. "Great" people don't have something that everyone else doesn't; they've simply removed a lot of the things that stand in the way of their best selves.
所以在你心里的那個偉大的人已經準備好要顯現了。每個人都肩負偉大的種子。"偉大"的人們不曾有過別人沒有的東西;他們僅僅只是移除了許多阻礙他們顯現最好自我的事物。
Unfortunately, our inherent gifts are often hidden by layers of masks and roles we've assumed. The roles-such as parent, worker, pillar of community, cynic, coach, outsider, cheerleader, nice guy, rebel, or loving child caring for ailing parent-can become "rocks" burying our true selves.
不幸的是，我們內在的天賦往往隱藏在面具和扮演的角色之下。角色——比如父親（母親）、工人、社區核心人物、憤世嫉俗者、教練、局外人、啦啦隊長、好人、反叛或照顧生病父母的有愛的孩子——可以成為埋葬我們真實自我的“巖石”。
Sometimes roles are thrust upon us: "I expect you to study hard and grow up to be a doctor." "Be ladylike." "Here at the firm, you must be efficient and diligent if you expect to advance."
有時角色是被強加于我們身上的：“我希望你努力學習，長大后成為一名醫生。”“像個淑女一樣。”“在這個公司里，如果你期望進步，你必須有效率、勤奮。”
Sometimes we eagerly assume roles because they are, or seem to be, useful, uplifting, or lucrative: "Mom always did it this way, so that's probably a good idea." "All Scout leaders are noble and sacrificing, so I will be noble and sacrificing." "I don't have any friends at school, the popular kids are surfers, so I'll be a surfer."
有時我們熱切地承擔角色，因為它們是或似乎是有用的、令人振奮、或利益豐厚的：“媽媽總是用這種方式，因此這也許是一個好主意”。“所有的童軍領袖都是高尚的和愿意犧牲的，因此我將是高尚的和愿意犧牲的。”“我在學校沒有任何朋友，受歡迎的孩子都是沖浪者，那么我就要做個沖浪者。”
Sometimes we consciously or unwittingly adopt new roles as circumstances change and are hurt by the result. For instance, a couple may say, "It was so wonderful before we got married. Once we were married, something went wrong." When the couple was together before, they were just being. The moment they got married they took on the roles that had been taught to them, trying to "be a husband" and "be a wife." On some subconscious level they "knew" what a husband or wife should be like and tried to act accordingly instead of being themselves and discovering what kind of spouses they wanted to be.
有時候，環境變化和被結果所傷時，我們在有意或無意中會采用新的角色。比如說，一對夫婦可能會說，“我們結婚之前的日子實在太美好了。可一旦我們結婚，什么都不對勁了。”當這對夫婦在一起之前，他們只是相處。他們結婚的那一刻，他們開始扮演那些曾教給他們的角色，試圖成為“一個丈夫”和“一個妻子”。在一些潛意識的層面，他們“知道”一個丈夫或妻子應該怎么樣并且試圖采取相應的行動，而不是做自己以及發現他們希望成為什么樣的配偶。
Or, as one man explained, "I was such a great uncle, now I feel so disappointed in the father I've become." As an uncle, he interacted with children from his heart. When he became a father, he felt he had a specific role to assume, but that role got in the way of his being who he is, authentically himself.
或者，正如一個人解釋的，“我是多么偉大的一個叔叔呀，可現在我對自己成為的這個父親感到失望。”作為一位叔叔，他用心接觸孩子。當他成為了一位父親時，他覺得他需要承擔一個特定的角色，但這種角色攔住了去路，那條通往他成為自己、真正的自己的那條路。
Page 2-7 from "Life Lessons: Two Experts on Death & Dying Teach Us About the Mysteries of Life & Living", by Elisabeth Kubler Ross and David Kessler
翻譯內容來自《人生之課：兩位死亡專家教給我們生命與生活的奧秘》第二至七頁，作者伊莉沙白·庫勒·羅斯與大衛·凱斯勒。
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