Today, my manager said I could go on a break when he came back from his. After 7 hours with him still missing, I started to get dizzy. I ended up passing out and hitting my head on a ladder from lack of food. I woke up in the hospital to a card from my manager saying, "Get Well. Don't Sue." FML
在小店工作，工作人員只有我跟我們店長，店長跟我預定今天我們輪換值班，結果輪到他的時候他一直沒有回來，老子連續(xù)上了7個小時的班，最終餓的暈了過去，然而這還不是重點，重點是老子從醫(yī)院醒來的時候發(fā)覺我的店長給我留了一張紙條，上面寫著“快點兒好起來，你要是敢投訴就死定了”，F(xiàn)ML
Today, myself and a co-worker had an aisle blocked because we were arranging new merchandise. A lady plowed her way through, scattering our work everywhere. She then yelled that we were lazy for having an aisle blocked and stormed off. FML
樓主在超市工作，今天跟同事在整理貨架的時候把暫時占用了一下過道（超市中的讓人走的通道，兩邊都是商品的），結果有一位中年婦女罵罵咧咧的從過道走過來了，一邊走一邊把我們放在過道的東西亂踢，還沒等樓主跟同事說話，人家留下一句“懶惰的東西”然后揚長而去。FML
Today, I had a chemistry midterm. There were 15 math problems, but no matter how many times I pressed the "On" button of my calculator, it wouldn't turn on. There were no spare calculators. Later, I tried to show my friend that my calculator wouldn't turn on. I pressed the button. It turned on. FML
上化學課，需要用到計算器，但是我的當時不知道怎么了，就是沒法啟動，然后我就想跟我的朋友吐槽一下，“我這個破計算器，怎么都啟動不了了”，然后華麗麗的看到我按下啟動按鈕之后計算器啟動了，我哥們跟看煞筆一樣看著我。???FML
Today, I was laid off from the job I'd had for two years. They couldn't even manage to spell my name or the company's name right on the severance letter. Guess I was a memorable employee. FML
公司的離職證明居然把我的名字跟公司的名字都拼錯了，我特么一定是去了一家假公司。FML
Today, when paying for gas, I realized I'd forgotten my wallet back home. After a moment of panic, I managed to remember my card number. I paid, blowing the cute cashier's mind, and drove away, before my car started sputtering and slowed to a crawl. I'd used the wrong fuel. FML
去加油站加油，發(fā)覺忘帶錢包了，絞盡腦汁最終終于想起來自己的銀行卡號，然后興奮的去收銀臺付錢，出來開上車就走，剛走了不一陣子，車子開始哼哼響，然后不走了，老子特么的加成了柴油。FML
Today, I'm recovering from a urinary tract infection. The infection made me have to pee constantly. Now the antibiotics I'm taking for it are giving me the shits instead. FML
前兩天尿道感染，然后一直不停的跑廁所尿尿，最后受不了了，找醫(yī)生開了點兒藥，嗯，現(xiàn)在倒是不用尿尿了，娘的改拉屎了。FML
